COURSE REVIEW

Palmetto: Myrtle Beach's version of Cheers, unperfect friendly golf

MYRTLE BEACH, S.C. (Nov. 3, 2004) - Charles Aouis has been waiting to tee off. And waiting. And waiting. Not that he's about to complain. In fact, it's hard to imagine anyone outside of Red Sox general manager Theo Epstein possessing a bigger late October grin than Aouis.

Aouis is having a great time on the Palmetto Course at Myrtlewood Golf Club, wait and all. It's a little hard to moan about a tee box traffic jam when the groups in front and behind you contributing mightily to the congestion are your buddies.

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"We've got 12 of us down here together, all from Danville (Virginia)," Aouis said, his driver once again hanging idly in his hand. "We're having a blast."

Aouis shrugged, smiled even wider. Where would you rather be waiting on the tee? In quiet Danville or golfing party town Myrtle Beach? To these guys the answer is obvious. They figure waits on the tees are a small price to pay for Palmetto's easy hospitality. After all, the club accommodated their group of 12, no problem.

Further up the course on the 11th fairway, Jack Armstrong, Eugene Cortes and Cuneyt Karul can relate. The three business associates have been searching for the beer cart girl for?oh, about 11 holes now. They're starting to think beer cart girls at Palmetto come around about as often as last night's lunar eclipse.

And?they couldn't be happier.

The group has turned the MIA beer cart girl into another running gag in a round of running gags.

"He's supposed to be buying us beers all round," Cortes said, pointing at Karul as everyone laughed. "So we think he must have paid off the beer cart girl not to come around."

"I do owe them a lot of beers," Karul said. "Good fortune I guess."

That only brought more laughs all around. Getting serious for a moment, Cortes addressed the particular power of Palmetto.

"The people with the course are just so nice, it's hard to get upset about anything," Cortes said. "From the guys in the clubhouse to the starter, it feels like a big neighborhood."

Welcome to Palmetto Golf Club, Myrtle Beach's version of Cheers. The fictional Cheers bar is little run down with the beer likely watered down. But everyone still kept going because Sam Malone was behind the bar, slinging stories and Norm and Cliff were on their reserved stools, grousing about one another and everything else.

Palmetto is charming in that Cheers sort of way. It doesn't offer awe-inspiring golf and it's usually jammed, but its people somehow make up for that. Palmetto may not be the place where everyone knows your name, but if you're a regular Myrtle Beach golfer, it just might. One of the older courses on the Grand Strand, Palmetto has turned into something of an institution, drawing loyal repeat business. It may not be perfect, but it's theirs.

Add in the fact that many golf tour package companies use Palmetto and chances are the frequent Myrtle Beach visitor's played here at one time or another.

"We're proud of our history," general manager Rich Schultz said. "We've had a lot of golfers come through here."

It's a credit to Schultz's staff that they seem to try and remember the names of every one of them.

A newcomer approaching the first tee is likely to get, "First timer, right?" from the grizzled, smiling starter.

For all the rounds it sees on a regular packed-in basis, Palmetto is in surprisingly good shape. Even on a day like today when the overseeding work is still coming through, the fairways offer plenty of legitimate landing areas. It's not as green as you might like, but it's extremely playable.

"I've played here three times over the last 15 years and it's always been in good, solid condition," said Armstrong, a Bostonian who comes to Myrtle Beach for a business conference every year. "It's very consistent. Some courses are great one year, bad the next year. Not here. When you come to Palmetto, you know what you're going to get."

What you get is a course with few wild thrills and plenty of solid character. The 179-yard, par-3 17th with its fairway dramatically bisected by a strand of the IntraCoastal Waterway is the hole you see on all of Palmetto's brochures. But in truth, it's the exception rather than rule. Most of Palmetto is made up of simple, traditional golf holes with bunkers as the main obstacles. But like Cheers, it may provide a few things you didn't except.

In Cheers that meant a pool room bigger than most Boston bars (like a supposed-to-be dive has a pool room someone on MTV Cribs would be jealous of). At Palmetto, it means sudden, hidden double bogey producers. The 404-yard, par-4 5th's fairway curves sharply right, leaving many golfers following their tee shots into the trees. The 468-yard, par-4 18th's green is protected by three bunkers, the one to the right where most golfers hit being downright gigantic.

Still, the laid-back, friendly atmosphere is definitely the star of Palmetto.

"It makes it fun no matter what," Cortes said. "I'll come back here."

"Maybe, we'll even find the beer cart girl next time," Karul shot back.

More laughs. Just another day at Palmetto. No one will mistake it for paradise, but sometimes you're not looking for paradise. Sometimes you don't even mind coming up empty looking for the beer cart girl.

The Verdict

Palmetto is supposed to be part of the IntraCoastal Waterway. And it is, technically. But in reality, it runs through more subdivisions than nature trials. You pass by at least three different subs during the round (it's easy to lose track) and almost as many building sites. The beep-beep of bulldozers backing up in the not-so distance provides the round's soundtrack. It's actually most noticeable on the 17th and 18th Waterway holes.

So it's not exactly nature and it's not exactly a speedy round. It is as the regulars attest still somehow relaxing. Everyone seems to be on vacation or pretending like they're on vacation and the attitude wears off on you. No one else seems to be in a hurry, so why should you? That sort of thing.

In an area marked by superstar designer courses that can carry the haughty attitude and greens fees to match, Palmetto can provide a refreshing change of pace. The par 4s are more challengingly than they first appear and the high bunker population ensures you'll get in work on your sand game.

Palmetto isn't the course you'll remember for a lifetime, but it may be the course where you have a great time with a few buddies.

Places to eat

Every fastfood and chain restaurant ever thought of competes for space along Highway 17. For something with a little more local character (or any local character), Bubba's Fish Shack ((843) 232-9798) in nearby Surfside Beach offers fish & chip combination platters for under $8. Avoid the poor imitation of Boston Clam Chowder at Budda's and go with the oysters instead. For something in less informal settings, The Melting Pot ((843) 692-9003) provides every type of cheese fondue imaginable and a molten chocolate dessert fondue that at least a few locals swear by.

Places to stay

Myrtlewood Villas ((888) 297-6200) isn't just the most convenient place to stay to play Palmetto, it's one of the most comfortable. Even the one-bedroom villas give you a mammoth amount of space compared to the average hotel room (and two bathrooms too). They're also much cleaner than many chain hotel/motel rooms. The Villas border the Myrtlewood Golf Club. You can walk from your villa to the clubhouse. Which might be advisable for exercise, especially since you need a cart on the course. Whatever midrange hotel or motel chain you fancy is also available on the 17 sprawl.